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From: Richard
Date: 14 Oct 2012
Time: 15:00:31 -0500
Remote Name: 89.243.97.73
Hi Ari, I took an anti depressant drug for 6 months. The drug helped me to stop worrying about my stutter and showing it. I had to loose all the mental pain that goes with stuttering. That took 2 weeks and many long hours of stuttering and then to play with my stutter without shame. It wasn't until I lost all the stuttering feelings, that I was able to stop stuttering the way I did even when the block began to happen. The stutter can't live without the feelings that go along with stuttering. Every time I tried to control my stutter over the years it was always the feelings that came back and my stutter would take over again. I knew I had no choice but to put every minute into dealing with the feelings. Minute after hour and then day for 2 weeks. First stutter to everyone until I couldn't care less what people thought, then change the way I stuttered as Van Riper taught until I stopped caring what I thought abut my stutter. I would be the one in the past who would avoid certain words and fear certain situations, I was the one making stuttering out to be this awful and terrible thing and yet I wouldn't deal with it. I thought if pain lasts long enough I would stop feeling pain, just like starting jogging for the first time. It's hurts for weeks and then the when you start running for longer distances it hurts again. Then after a lot of training the pain stops. The same principle was my thought on stuttering. Nowadays I start the day reading or talking without control until I block uncontrollably and just hold onto to it taking the feeling then start playing with the block. By changing the way I felt about my speech and working on light lip contacted and moving forward, (always thinking a head and not the word I'm saying)I found words I would have blocked on would stop getting stuck in my throat and trip off my lips. I read aloud every morning for about 5 minutes as fast as I can until I stutter then hold it and play with it. I found out on my own really, that the stutter feeds off feelings. My stuttering habit is so strong I have to stutter every morning before leaving the house so I can use the Van Riper therapy without even thinking about it for the rest of the day. As soon as I felt I would stutter, I would. No feelings about stuttering, controlling the stuttering becomes second nature. In conclusion, without working long and hard on the feelings first before the way I spoke, the way I have been taught over the years, my stutter always won. To stop caring is to stop thinking, to stop thinking about stuttering is to to stop stuttering. Hope that helps regards Richard