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From: Pam
Date: 04 Oct 2010
Time: 13:05:19 -0500
Remote Name: 163.153.6.70
Scott, I am enjoying this conversation as well. You wrote: “Guilt is defined (medically speaking) as: "feelings of culpability especially for imagined offenses or from a sense of inadequacy: morbid self-reproach often manifest in marked preoccupation with the moral correctness of one's behavior responses originating in inner guilt and uncertainty". What does that mean to me? . . . . . . I can so relate to this because I have been dealing with self-critical feelings for a long time. I am very careful to not let most of the world see my private self. My private and public selves are often very much at odds, and often it seems like I am looking down at my public persona, wondering, “Who is she? Where does she get the strength and energy?” My inner self often feels like a wimp due to the self reproach and feelings of not ever being or doing enough. I know much of this comes from being the adult child of an alcoholic – where nothing was ever good enough. Surely COA’s deal with guilt more than any other feeling, I would guess. The combination of these feelings, my stuttering journey and my steps towards acceptance is what compelled me to start blogging almost two years ago. Writing is so cathartic!